Moves and other things

If you’re an expat in Buenos Aires (and an immigrant/expat anywhere in the world) you WILL run into shitty landlords. I’ve had plenty of these:

  • In San Telmo one landlord would come over with his girlfriend, smoke weed all day, take showers that lasted up to two hours, and walked around in his underwear.
  • In Belgrano I had a roommate once asked me to cough less in my sleep even though it wasn’t something I could really help thanks to bronchitis.

But this case is far worse here in Palermo. I was paying 4000 pesos for a fully furnished room when I was suddenly told I could either pay the same and they’d stick another bed in my room because I could share it OR I could pay 8000 pesos and stay alone, PLUS give another deposit.

Of course I’m leaving this apartment. There are a lot of memories here because one of my really good friends lived here and I had already been here to so many dinners, chats, and parties. Naturally my friends and I are saying goodbye to this simple space because it was a home to all of us.

In an unrelated note, I made up a manifesto about men in general. Over my time here I’ve had about seven men just randomly kiss me without my consent. (One I was sort of ok with so let’s make it six then). I get hook-up culture and when you’re younger and in college it’s sort of ok. It’s also ok if you’re any age and it happens to be your thing, but it isn’t mine.

I haven’t been actively pursuing a relationship but I know that I would want it to start in a way that involves talking, maybe being friends with and just letting things flow. It’s really common in Argentina for guys to just kiss you after hitting on you and then asking if you want to have sex with them. I don’t judge women who are ok with this, it just means they have a different set of values when it comes to this and they’re happy with this. Not me.

I’ve been told by one guy here (consistently, I might add) that I’m a difficult woman. In my defense he was one of those guys and he wanted to take me home with him on what happened to be one of the shittiest days/months of my life. There’s no way he would’ve enjoyed being with me when I was that much of an emotional and financial wreck. Even though I owe him no explanations I tried to once and he laughed in my face.

I’ve decided I deserve better than this. For the rest of my time here I’m just going to focus on friendships, both with men and women, of course. I’m never going to adjust to the dating culture here. I don’t care for dating apps and realized that I have to make the foundation for the things I want. In the end, I was stupid enough to actually fall for one of these guys and the universe didn’t conspire in my favor but at least I know that I deserve to be liked/loved/asked out for who I am on the inside and not just what someone wants to get out of me physically.

 

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Author: ingridiswriting

los sabios no juzgan

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